Hi again, I hope you have had a positive week. I am still getting over that “man flu”…. ok, a slight chesty cough! I spent last weekend with old friends from my TaeKwon-Do world helping out at the English Open championships, so amazing to see the new standard growing day by day.
And while there, everyone was commenting on the wonderful changes I have taken on in my life and I put it all down simply to being kinder to who I am.
So, this weeks theme is simply – how to be kinder to ourselves.

Being kind to yourself is important for many reasons, but it can be difficult to do when you’re feeling stressed, overwhelmed, or insecure. Here are three top tips for a calmer way of thinking:

1. Challenge your negative thoughts.

When you have a negative thought about yourself, ask yourself if it’s really true. Is there any evidence to support it? Or is it just a thought that you’re having? If it’s not true, challenge the thought and replace it with a more positive one.

For example, if you think to yourself, “I’m such a failure,” ask yourself if there’s any evidence to support that thought. Have you really failed at everything? Or have you just had a few setbacks? If it’s not true that you’re a failure, replace the thought with a more positive one, such as, “I’m still learning and growing.”

2. Focus on your strengths.

Everyone has strengths and weaknesses. When you’re feeling down about yourself, focus on your strengths. What are you good at? What do you enjoy doing? Make a list of your strengths and refer to it whenever you’re feeling down.

This can help you to remember that you’re a valuable person with something to offer the world. It can also help you to feel more confident in your abilities.

3. Practice self-compassion.

Self-compassion is the practice of treating yourself with kindness and understanding, even when you make mistakes. It’s about accepting yourself for who you are, flaws and all.

When you’re feeling down about yourself, remind yourself that everyone makes mistakes. Be kind to yourself and treat yourself with the same compassion that you would treat a friend.

Here are some additional tips for being kind to yourself:

• Forgive yourself for your mistakes. Everyone makes mistakes. It’s part of being human. When you make a mistake, forgive yourself and move on. Don’t dwell on it and beat yourself up about it.
• Set realistic expectations for yourself. Don’t expect to be perfect. Set realistic goals for yourself and be proud of your accomplishments, no matter how small they may seem.
• Take care of yourself physically and emotionally. Make sure to eat healthy foods, get enough sleep, and exercise regularly. Also, find healthy ways to manage stress, such as yoga, meditation, or spending time in nature.
• Surround yourself with positive people. The people you spend time with can have a big impact on your self-esteem. Surround yourself with people who love and support you, and who make you feel good about yourself.

Being kind to yourself is not selfish. It’s essential for your well-being. When you’re kind to yourself, you’re more likely to be happy, healthy, and successful.

Here are some additional tips for developing a calmer way of thinking:

• Practice mindfulness. Mindfulness is the practice of paying attention to the present moment without judgment. When you’re mindful, you’re aware of your thoughts and feelings, but you don’t get caught up in them.

One way to practice mindfulness is to meditate. Meditation is the practice of focusing your attention on something, such as your breath or a mantra. There are many different types of meditation, so find one that works for you.

Another way to practice mindfulness is to simply pay attention to the present moment throughout the day. When you’re eating, focus on the taste of the food and the sensation of chewing. When you’re walking, focus on the feeling of your feet on the ground and the sound of your breath.

• Challenge your negative beliefs. We all have negative beliefs about ourselves, but these beliefs are often not true. When we catch ourselves having a negative thought, we can challenge it by asking ourselves if there’s any evidence to support it. If not, we can replace the negative thought with a more positive one.

For example, if we think to ourselves, “I’m not good enough,” we can challenge that thought by asking ourselves if there’s any evidence to support it. Have we really failed at everything? Or have we just had a few setbacks? If it’s not true that we’re not good enough, we can replace the thought with a more positive one, such as, “I’m still learning and growing.”

• Practice self-compassion. Self-compassion is the practice of treating ourselves with kindness and understanding, even when we make mistakes. It’s about accepting ourselves for who we are, flaws and all.

When we make a mistake, we can be kind to ourselves and remind ourselves that everyone makes mistakes. We can also practice self-compassion by talking to ourselves the way we would talk to a friend.

Have a happy week, don’t forget to make time for you each day. Positive thoughts when you wake up.

Stay caring and be kind.

Martin